Letting Go

February 12, 2015
by Lee

I realize that it has been a long time since I have written anything to update this website. It has not been a lack of interest towards racing, it has been a lack of interest in parts of my life. Bigger lacks of interest to a lot of things other than writing about racing. Some of it was even a lack of interest in even going on with what my life was at that time.

If you have ever known a person who is going through the blues, or even yourself, you probably have heard to just cheer up. Sometimes it is not as simple as just cheering up. Nothing seems to bring joy or that spirit of life that you use to have.

I have been through a long journey in order to find myself and what I use to have in mind. I use to have joy and excitement. It was all lost for a long period of time for me. I have gone through a divorce, and I only see my sons for only about 90 to 100 days a year. Heartbreaking when you know how much those little guys like hanging out with you and look up to you.

I have seen doctors and even have taken medications to help with the darkness. I have spent some hours in the “chair” talking about my feelings with specialists who probably really do not care one way or the other. Yet they do try to help you understand some of things you are experiencing. Just does not seem to be genuine though.

Moving on though. Back in May, I made the decision that it was time for me to find something within myself and to put myself back on track. It has not been easy, but today I am in a better place. I have a great women in my life, for the first time in my life I actually exercise, and I have drive back in my life. I am completely looking forward to spending the rest of my life with her. I even get to have the unique experience of seeing a now six year old girl grow up. I am the youngest of four kids, two sisters that are older than me, a much different perspective I have never experienced watching that young one. A great experience to say the least. Actually, whether it be the young boys who are my sons, or the young little lady now in my life, you can take a lot from a child’s perspective.

It is not easy everyday. I still have days that I wonder what I am doing. The roller coaster goes up and the roller coaster goes down. Learning to deal with the ups and downs will always be something that I will have to work on. I may even struggle with it on days. The good news is, the ups are far more at this point than the downs. Also having a great woman in my life that understands you cannot simply cheer up helps a lot. She is actually a registered nurse, so she has full understanding of some of the things that make me who I am.

In the end, I had to learn to let go. What has happened in the past cannot be changed. Think about that for a moment. There is no way to go back and change anything that has happened on any particular day. You cannot change the good, or even the worst evils that you have ever experienced. I now look forward to moving forward and seeing what can be accomplished in the future.

So, I am also looking forward to getting back to racing this weekend. I am also looking forward to providing my thoughts on the on track action. I am looking forward to seeing how this season plays out. I am looking forward to attending a number of races with my great friends and the great woman in my life.

If this is the first article you have read on our website, thank you. If this is the first time you happened by an article that I have written or we have provided on our site, thank you as well for stopping by again. Please feel free to leave any comments you might have.

Finally, I am not a doctor or anything like that. I will say this though, if you or someone you know is struggling with depression or any other type of mental illness, please seek help or help that person seek help. There is a light, and it can be overcome. I know it is cliché to say that, but we all have friends and family that we love. Let them know you are there for them.

Good luck to your driver as the racing season begins, I hope you stop back by to see our site, and happy, exciting racing to all!

 

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